Never just language, never just a movement with your arm and never just THE Germans by Kaja Roscher

Posted: November 22, 2018

May 2018, Yad Vashem, Israel

I am German.

I watch all these people around me walking through Israel's biggest Holocaust memorial. Some of them walk slowly like they need some time to let all these horrible and brutal pictures and words arrive in their minds. Others walk fast. It seems like they just want to get out of here.

I am German.

We all stop at the signs which have been written by the Nazis. I am reading the lies and the rules which don't make any sense. Then I realize that I am probably the only person in this room who can read these signs without a translation. When words get translated you get more of a distance from them. I feel like the translation puts a level of protection between you and the words. In this room I am the person with the least amount of protection and the least distance to these words. That’s why they hurt me the most.
This language is my language. People used the language I dream in as a brutal weapon against humanity.

I am German.

There is this one thing everybody thinks about when they hear “German” The Holocaust.

What about me? What do I think about when I hear “German?”

I think about my hometown Berlin. I think about all my friends living there, my family, my school and all my memories that are connected to my home country.

I am German.

I also feel this responsibility. The second World War has a big influence on how people see me as a German, but it also has a big influence on how I see myself as a German.
I was raised with terms describing war, discrimination and brutality. They have always been around me. When I first heard about the Second World War I wasn’t even in elementary school. In history, which is a mandatory class, we spent the whole of grade ten talking about the time of the Nazi’s and I have already been to two concentration camps in my 16 years of life.

I am German.

The moment when I realized that this is not how children in other countries learn about World War II was when I came to Canada as an exchange student. You as Canadians have a different way to talk about World War II because it is not a part of  your national identity and that’s fine. I can understand that people here have a different view on WWII. Sometimes I feel like people here just have a different view on history in general, not better or worse, just a different way to reflect the past. That’s okay. But it’s not okay when people do the Hitler salute when they see me in the hallway. I wanted to run away, but I couldn’t move. I wanted to scream, but there were no words.

I am German.

The next time I had a similar experience I tried to talk. I tried to explain what it means and especially what it means to me. While we were talking I realized the same thing that I also realized in Israel. Most people who are not German don’t say “The Nazis”, they say “The Germans.” It’s right that the Nazis were German, but not all Germans were Nazis. You could say that this is not important because it is “just” language, but it is never “just” language.

It’s never just language, it’s never just a movement you do with your arm and it’s never just THE Germans.